{Aisle Say by Candice}: Wedding Day Emergency Kit

You have spent months planning your special day, not to mention the heaps of money you’ve spent, so you want to be equipped for any little glitch or nuisances that can arise at or before the wedding. Make sure you fill your kit with all those oh-so-useful things that will ‘save the day’.

Photo credit: {ohhappyday.com}

Bride-essentials:
Clear nail polish…for any stocking snags
Perfume…choose a special fragrance to match your day
Super-glue…for a nail, heel of a shoe or any bow that needs to stay in place
Herbal Rescue Remedy drops…soothes the nerves naturally
Drinking straws…avoid smudging your lipstick and still keep hydrated
Hand lotion…to keep your pretty hands moisturised
Ipod/MP3…with favourite tunes to relax you while getting ready
Lip gloss…will need to reapply often between all the photos and celebration kisses
Chocolates/snacks…sweeten up your special day and give you an energy boost
Tampons…nature can sneak up on you especially when you’re wearing white

Groom-essentials:
Socks...to make sure there are no excuses for ‘cold feet‘
Hip flask ...little sips to calm his nerves
Mints...to ensure a fresh kiss
Note pad & pen…to write down any last minute speech changes
Stress ball…a little distraction to pass time
Biltong…a small manly snack for him to enjoy
Extra shirt buttons…in haste he might be a bit more forceful
Cologne…he can smell as wonderful as he looks

General items:

Toothbrush, Toothpaste, Dental Floss, Headache Tablets, Antacid, Eye Drops, Band-Aids, Facial Tissues, Deodorant, Emery Board, Nail Clipper, Adhesive Bandages, Antiseptic Cream, Hair Brush, Hair Spray, Hair Pins, Mirror (small) Lint Remover, Mending Kit, Scissors, Safety Pins, Stain Remover, Static Remover, Double-Sided Hem Tape, Corsage Pins, Sticky Tape, Matches, Tweezers, Sunscreen, Umbrella, Wedding Day Schedule and List of Important Contact Numbers!

Wherever you are, your wedding kit should be within arm's reach. Usually the Bridesmaid is allocated the responsibility of moving and monitoring it. It can be kept under the front pew at the ceremony, in your room at the reception hall, or even under the main table.

Just in case ‘murphy’s law’ isn’t on your side on your wedding day, you’ll be equipped to dodge any curve balls swiftly and easily. Most of these goodies won’t go to waste either as they will definitely come in handy on your honeymoon too.

Tip for Bride-to-be: If you do not want to ‘throw’ your own special garter then add a spare garter into your kit for the traditional toss.

Contact Candice* at Live Love Dream and invest in a Pre-Marriage Course to ensure your Happily Ever After...

*With a Degree in Psychological Counselling, Candice Luck of Live Love Dream specialises in presenting fun, modern Pre-Marriage courses, that assists couples in building a marriage based on communication, transparency and connection

Lovely Highveld Winter Wedding

We all know that winter isn’t really the preferred season to get married in for Highveld brides. Which is a bit odd because our winters are fairly pleasant, and with beautiful sunshine and almost no risk of rain (global warming permitting), our winter days are often better than what our friends in the northern hemisphere experience on a good Summer’s day!

Having said that, we wanted to show you Riette and Eugene’s stunning winter wedding taken this June by our friend Alexander Smith at Olive Mystery in Bapsfontein. We love the little flower girl’s in their winter outfits, Riette’s grey shrug, and the couples laid back and relaxed approach which was permeated through their choice of venue and in the details of their wedding. To view more, click here.

Photo credits: {alexandersmith.co.za}

{Etsy find of the week}: The Lonely Heart

If you haven’t heard about Etsy.com, you’ve possibly been living under a rock. It’s a social commerce site, specifically focused on selling handmade or vintage items. There's a plethora of cute finds on here, and you can have the items shipped to SA. Every Monday, starting from now, we’ll profile our cutest Etsy find for you. Vendors that can add value and flair to your wedding! We hope you enjoy!

Today we showcase “The Lonely Heart”, which specializes in handmade personalised ribbon, wedding gifts, favours, decor & more. We personally love the range of ribbon, the vintage confetti and the letter blocks, which can be used for table numbers, photo props and more. Check out The Lonely Heart on Etsy.com for more.

Photo credits: {etsy.com}

{Aisle Say by Candice}: Let the games begin - Guest lists & Seating plans

Guest lists and seating plans are the two planning issues that always seem to cause conflict. This is true for any wedding couple no matter how compatible they are. Understandably so, because the Bride & Groom are trying to keep a multitude of people happy.

The guest list is one of the first important tasks to tackle, as it’ll determine the size of the venue you’ll need and obviously the impact on your budget. You want to spend your pennies on the people that mean the most to you on your wedding day. However, it’s a good idea to invite 10% more guests than your target as statistics reveal that 10-20% of those invited will decline.

Photo credits: {barbaraweddings.wordpress.com}

For clarity and ease of reference, make two guest lists. List A will include essential family and close friends. List B will include the non-essential but nice-to-have colleagues and extended friends. To assist with categorising, ask yourself this question, ‘who is relevant in your life right now and who will probably still be relevant in 5 years from now?’

Co-workers: If you socialise with them beyond the noisy cafeteria at work, then you should probably invite them. After all, you want someone in the office to enjoy wedding chatter with.
Singles: Make it a rule that their partners will be included if they have been dating a ‘significant other’ for a year at the time the invites are sent AND you have met their partner a few times. Also note that for some of your single friends it can be more stressful for them to find a ‘plus one’, so encourage them to come alone.
Kiddies: If you decide it is a ‘nay’ then be upfront and make it clear that no under 18’s will be allowed. Most couples with children will take advantage of this as a ‘date night’ and gladly organise a baby sitter.

The seating plan is the next challenge. Do not even start this until two weeks before the wedding once you have received the RSVPs and know your final numbers. Be realistic that there will also be ‘plus one’ requests and cancellations.

Create a spread-sheet for your RSVP replies and have a column where you will indicate the relationship to Bride or Groom, for example: Bride’s Aunt, Bride’s cousin, Groom’s best friend’, Groom’s Grandparents etc. Also highlight Bride & Groom with two distinct colours. This will make it much easier when planning as if you group according to colour.

You want to make sure that all your wedding guests feel special and that they weren’t seated in any hierarchical positioning. A great solution is to disperse members of the wedding party amongst the other guests. Let both sets of parents ‘host’ their own tables, it is definitely more fun for them than being on display at an isolated main table.

There will be a fair amount of ‘musical chairs’ as you have to consider some estranged family members (no family is complete without them) you will want to seat them as far apart as possible. Other than a few older ‘fuddy duddies’, you shouldn’t get your garter in a twist. Most of your friends and younger family members will invariably be chatting up a storm after two drinks and that is when they will start to relax into enjoying the celebration of your special day.

With some good pointers and rules to apply, you and your Groom should now feel more confident that you can master these two trickiest of tasks efficiently. You are now free to enjoy the rest of the 120+ other matters on your wedding to-do-list.

Tip for the Bride-to-be: Instead of table numbers, you can be different and name the tables, for example: If you both love red wine then your tables could be named: Merlot, Pinotage, Shiraz etc.

Contact Candice* at Live Love Dream and invest in a Pre-Marriage Course to ensure your Happily Ever After... *With a Degree in Psychological Counselling, Candice Luck of Live Love Dream specialises in presenting fun, modern Pre-Marriage courses, that assists couples in building a marriage based on communication, transparency and connection.

{Aisle Say by Candice}: Yours, mine, ours

By the time you walk down the aisle, you’re mostly comfortable with the term ‘our’: our place, our dog, our favourite restaurant, our life together etc. You’ve figured out the basic division of what’s yours, what’s his, and what you share. But...what changes and what stays the same after you become Mr & Mrs?

We’re all aware that even though the priority is placed on the ‘our’, there still needs to be a balance between these 3 possessive nouns. You still need to respect and make room for the ‘your’ and the ‘mine within your marriage.

Photo credit: {renschemari.com}

Yours: ‘that which belongs to you’. Your partner should be able to own some of his favoured possessions and be responsible for some individual chores and finances. Even though he becomes your husband, he still needs space to be himself.

Mine: ‘something that belongs to me’. You will also want to maintain some independence, be able to purchase some of your own items and be accountable for certain things. It’s very healthy to keep your individual identity.

Ours: ‘that belonging to us’. As a couple you create a life together where you merge your past and build a future based on a commitment to sharing everything.

It can be tricky to keep neat dividers between the 3. It’s important that once you become husband and wife you re-assess the ‘your’, ‘mine’ and ‘our’ boxes. Make sure that you’re on the same page as to what belongs to whom and where. Clarity and agreement from the beginning will avoid many future conflicts, especially when it comes to house chores and finances. Obviously you also need to remain flexible to make room for changes, as long as you discuss which ‘box’ it belongs to.

A word of caution: do not bring this possession ‘tug-of-war’ into the conflict equation. When you’re feeling in love and happy, it’s naturally ‘ours’ but then if you have an argument and go into ‘defence mode’, you automatically will want to possess, for example: ‘Get out of MY house!’

Remember, you are 2 individuals that come together to form a married unit. If you can find a healthy balance between the ‘your’, ’mine’ and ‘our’, then you are well on your way to learning what a happy marriage is all about.

Tip for the Bride-to-be: Attending a Pre-Marriage Course is very beneficial and with the support of a Coach, allows you and your partner to gain meaningful insight as to how you can achieve this balance.

Contact Candice* at Live Love Dream and invest in a Pre-Marriage Course to ensure your Happily Ever After.

*With a Degree in Psychological Counselling, Candice Luck of Live Love Dream specialises in presenting fun, modern Pre-Marriage courses, that assists couples in building a marriage based on communication, transparency and connection.

Vintage & DIY Prettiness at Oakfield Farm

One of Johannesburg’s loveliest wedding venues, Oakfield Farm, was the setting for this distinctly DIY vintage wedding. Amy and Jeff tied the knot in February and their reception was held at Oakfield’s Summer House venue, which is a lovely, airy venue, with loads of natural light making it perfect for the vintage theme.

Amy, Jeff, her mom and a friend helped make the 300 m (!) of bunting which adorned the high beam ceilings. Baby’s breath, vintage books and trophies adorned the tables. And as a vintage wedding isn’t complete without some nostalgic pieces from grandparents, Amy made a point of incorporating her Grandpa Jan's vintage cameras into her decor.

Personally, we’re loving the black balloons, Amy’s dress and handmade lace rosette (from Little White Dress on Etsy), the baby's breath bouquet and the red vintage car... The talented Black Frame Photography is to thank for the beautiful pics and the vintage decor was hired from Moi Decor. Enjoy! xx

Photo credits: {Black Frame Photography}

{Aisle Say by Candice}: Mother-in-law: Friend or Foe?

For some ladies, hearing those 3 little words can give them an instant headache! In-laws can be difficult, intrusive, controlling and opinionated but it’s definitely worth trying to get on with them as there are many years ahead and having a smoother ride will be more enjoyable.

Photo credit: {chiqweddings.com}


Boundaries These are like invisible little fences which can be very effective for separating and distinguishing different zones/areas. You and your husband-to-be will need to work as a team to put the ‘fences’ up and maintain them. If you can get healthy boundaries established it will be a valuable tool to keep respect and harmony between families. Boundaries come in many forms:

What you tell them: avoid involving them in any of your arguments and stick to positive things to say about each other in their company.

Time & holidays: weekends are precious and you must agree on how often you want to see each other’s parents. Is it going to be every weekend or a dinner once a week or a lunch once a month?

Decision making: together you are now your own family unit so all important decisions must be made by the two of you. In-laws will always want to offer advice but you must still make the final decisions.

Social events(birthdays, special occasions): you need to share and experience these special dates with both sets of parents, if possible. Discuss how you will you rotate the hosting responsibilities for Christmas holidays, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Easter holidays etc.

Remember to be compassionate and think about how you would want your child to treat you one day under similar circumstances. A mother who has dedicated the last 3 decades to loving and worrying about her son will find it very difficult to relinquish his welfare to his spouse. Each family is protective over their own and that is very natural. They want what’s best for you and to see you happy but it is very hard for a mother to let their child go in order to live and learn about life as an adult.

Remember you fell in love with her son, so she must have done something right as a parent.

Photo credit: {barbaraweddings.wordpress.com}

General pointers

• Never force your spouse to choose between you and their parents. It’s very unfair and will just make matters worse.
• Don’t feel obliged to call her “Mother” or “Mom” unless you have a warm, friendly relationship. If you need to be more assertive then calling her by her first name will help set the tone for an equal relationship.
• Recognize and avoid actions or words that may trigger conflict. If your Mom-in-law is an efficient time-keeper then try not to be late.
• Compliments go a long way, as a woman you know how good it feels. Find a genuine compliment, such as: “those are pretty earrings”, “I like your new hair-cut”, “that colour suits you”, “what a delicious meal.” This will give her a little confidence boost and change her mood. Give compliments that you truly mean because false compliments will sound insincere.

When it comes to your Mother-in-law don’t get caught in the cliché trap. You don’t need a mean “Monster-in-law”, like in the movies. Take a closer look and decide if your mother-in-law is really as bad as you think. She is your husband’s mother and while she may or may not become your friend, she does deserve your respect and vice versa.

Tip for the Bride-to-be: Be aware that you don’t want to be labelled as the grumpy/sour/moody/selfish daughter-in-law either. Some effort from your side will pay off in your favour in the end, so persevere in creating a healthy relationship with your beloved. He will love you more for it.

Contact Candice* at Live Love Dream and invest in a Pre-Marriage Course to ensure your Happily Ever After.

*With a Degree in Psychological Counselling, Candice Luck of Live Love Dream specialises in presenting fun, modern Pre-Marriage courses, that assists couples in building a marriage based on communication, transparency and connection.

DIY: Coffee Filter Roses

We thought it time for another DIY and we came across these lovely paper roses – made from coffee filters. They come out looking gorgeous and you can use them for a myriad of things on your wedding day: as favours, boutonnieres, cake decorations, for centrepieces or even for your bouquet!

Photo credit: {emmalee-design.com}
What’s so great about these roses is that they all come out looking a bit different and you can really choose how you want to dye them – with red wine, beetroot juice or just some water colours. The coffee paper filter really absorbs the colours very well.
We found this tutorial on emmalee-design.com, so click here for a detailed step by step tutorial! After that, let your imagination take the lead in deciding where and how to use them!

Photo credit: {bridalmusings.com}